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OMG I would be devastated if I saw one of my cards being destroyed!! I am a sentimental old fool and have boxes full of cards and letters that people have sent me since I was about 11 but I appreciate that not everyone is like me! I know at least one card I have made for a friend has been framed and everytime I send a card that is not acknowledged I remind myself of that. I do tend to send handmade to everyone but have a mental list of people who get my 'took all weekend' cards and those who get my '10 minute' cards.
Oh forgot to say - have got a fab stamp I use on some of my envelopes now. It says this envelope contains and then various tick options including something like 'a gorgeous card made by me that you must treasure for ever' - just my not so subtle way of making sure the recipient knows I made it for them lol
I was talking to my friend yesterday about this same topic! We have decided that noone likes our cards as much as we do! Tee hee... I think everyone should jump up and down when they receive them. Most people dont even call me when they get one. Oh well...
Oh forgot to say - have got a fab stamp I use on some of my envelopes now. It says this envelope contains and then various tick options including something like 'a gorgeous card made by me that you must treasure for ever' - just my not so subtle way of making sure the recipient knows I made it for them lol
Pootle
VERY cool! Would love to hear where you purchased your stamp... do you have a sample to share?
MAlinda I am thinking your grandmother SAVED your cards because they were so beautiful and she didn't have any "cardworthy" friends deserving of your art.
It took several tries to get my mother to actually send out the cards I gave her *that must be where I got it from..
and I knew I had arrived when I got one of my OWN cards back!!! LOL
betsy
and to the original poster
I am so sorry your feelings were rightfully hurt but we will all PM our addresses and you can send cards to US the appreciative and cardworthy so WE can heap praises upon your head
veganf how about you pm us each your address and we can turn it into a RAK/SWAP/LOVEFEST?
just tell us who else is in (how many swaps to make) and we can self-medicate as a group with swanky love-tokens!
anyone else?
I suppose I should ask first ! (blush)
I know it is close to Christmas, but I have to go and be with unnappreciative, non-crafty (are they aliens?) family so I'd like to look forward to a *creative* Christmas instead of the whole family commercial grabfest that I usually endure.
And if it would make you feel better...dontcha love gettin' mail? Just say the word and I'm in!
it's only an idea...
...
__________________ if your path is boobytrapped you are probably on the right track to treasure BUT if everything is inordinately hard you probably are rushing to the final exam in the wrong place a day early.
Ah, guys, I'm sorry some of you have had your feelings hurt. I had stopped sending cards to my husband's side of the family because I thought they were unappreciated and my MIL would always say that the verse was more important than the picture, grrrr!
Anyway, we are going to visit this weekend and she rang last night to ask me if I had any spare Christmas cards that she could give to her special friends, I almost dropped the phone.
So guys we have at least one convert.
And I think the RAK is a lovely idea and if you don't mind a Brit joining in, I would love to be involved.
sometimes I feel like I could just drop a wad of cash in a brown paper bag and it would be enough for certain people as a xmas gift.
like pootle, I am just another sentimental old fool.
I am game for the RAK/swap/lovefest!
Very nice idea, the only thing is, I have to admit: I've never participated in a swap!! I don't know the first thing about how they work! So if you all could enlighten me, that'd be awesome!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by laxeash
Can I vent too?
Oh btw, DH is also removed from the list when he said this the last time I gave him card - 'Oh, why do u want to give the card to me & waste it?' I didn't give him one for our anniversary or his b'day & he didn't miss it either.
Easwari
No, no, no - You say "Honey, you are so worth it" and heap homemade cards on him. He is, isn't he? My DH doesn't get it and doesn't keep my cards. He's a guy and completely male, BUT I know that he would be hurt if I didn't give him a homemade card. Besides, I make them because it expresses MY love not the receiver's. He doesn't make me a homemade card, but, except for a horrible Mother's Day card last year, he usually picks out a card with a meaningful sentiment.
Oh btw, DH is also removed from the list when he said this the last time I gave him card - 'Oh, why do u want to give the card to me & waste it?' I didn't give him one for our anniversary or his b'day & he didn't miss it either.
I was thinking about this, and thought that at least he was honest about it, unlike some MILs out there who say this kind of thing and then cry and get upset when you follow through on it. But, it would be even nicer if he would just appreciate and support your handcrafting! I know there are "four different ways of love" or however many that book says there is, but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realise the amount of effort we put into our cards even strictly timewise, much less our emotional investment.
Very nice idea, the only thing is, I have to admit: I've never participated in a swap!! I don't know the first thing about how they work! So if you all could enlighten me, that'd be awesome!
- Krista
once everyone has "joined" you could personal message each swapper by clicking on her name on the left. Give out a secure mailing address, if you want, your home or a PO box is fine.(it's up to you) Then, if it's 5 people, we make 5 cards, all the same, plus one for you as a gift for hosting.( so, 6) We'll send 'em off, with return postage and you shuffle them and make 5 packets containing one of each card and return them to each of us by mail. Plus one packet you get to keep!
If you want extras , just sign-up too and make something great! I am looking forward to seeing your talent! You'll still get an extra share for hosting.
If you are intimidated I will host for you but, hey!, it's all about YOU this time Babe!
And Swapping is the best way to share with like-minded individuals!
__________________ if your path is boobytrapped you are probably on the right track to treasure BUT if everything is inordinately hard you probably are rushing to the final exam in the wrong place a day early.
I was thinking about this, and thought that at least he was honest about it, unlike some MILs out there who say this kind of thing and then cry and get upset when you follow through on it. But, it would be even nicer if he would just appreciate and support your handcrafting! I know there are "four different ways of love" or however many that book says there is, but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realise the amount of effort we put into our cards even strictly timewise, much less our emotional investment.
DH encourages me to indulge in my hobbies but is sometimes insensitive. I was offended not bcoz he didn't appreciate my work but that he was insensitive to my sentiments. I guess I got the topics mixed up. So ya, my SIL & lots of ppl are unappreciative of my handiwork but my DH appreciates of the handiwork & not the sentiment ;)
DH used to balk at how much I spent on my "crafting" with stamps. I kindly with a "smile" reminded him how much he has spent on hunting stuff. (we live in North Idaho and hunting is huge here)
I reminded him of the rifle he had to have, the cost of tags and license, clothes, taking a week off work and so on.....
Funny....he hasn't brought it up since then.
I don't give my dh handmade cards either because they get tossed in the trash but the ones with sentiments in them...yep....he saves them. Go figure!
Blessings,
Jennifer
I have to say that I never really worried about others thought about my cards, because I enjoyed making them. After 6 years of making cards, I have finally started to receive High Praise for my creations. My family has always said things like, "Oh, how nice," but at my Brothers' Birthday's (we celebrate 3 brothers, 1 BIL, and 5 nephews together as their b-days are within 3 weeks of eachother) 2 of my brothers specifically made a point of saying how nice the card was and how much they appreciated it. They couldn't believe I made it. To me, for my brothers to say something, made me feel on top of the world.
I have to admit, that noone in my family acknowledges that I have sent a handmade card. One day, I was talking with my step mom and she asked why my dad got a Hallmark f-day card (I was in a pinch and needed to get it out that morning). I was shocked!! She then went on the tell me that she has saved every one of my handmade cards and to prove it she showed them to me. I was shocked to say the least. I have no learned that just because they don't say anything about receiving the card, it is possible they really like it.
Another example is I send "Back to school" cards to my cousin's kids. Well, I was looking through their scrapbook and there they all were! I got a little warm feeling inside. =)
But, here is my question. I have a cousin who will recycle my card. Meaning, she takes the front off and attaches it to a different card. At first I was kinda offended. But I think she means well. What do you guys think?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SherylD
Usually, they open the envelope, open the card, and look for the green paper they sometimes comes in the middle. The card is tossed aside.
Both of my boys appricate cards...in fact for Nolan's 1st b-day he wouldn't put the cards down to open his presents! ;) I think I did something right somewhere!
I agree with most of the other comments and just buy her a card next time...or even better just use a tag!
__________________ Heather
Mama to 3 boys! 8yo, 6yo and 5yo!! Stop saying "I can't". You can. You just chose not to.
After quite a few similar stories I've come to the conclusion that I make the cards for my own pleasure it creating them. If someone enjoys them, great. Otherwise, I try not to go to nutty over it. I mean I've seen pottery that my friends have made that I think is pretty awful, but they love it! So, we just need to concentrate on relaxing and having fun with our own hobbies!!
__________________ Dear Paperlicious is my blog...with a series on how I'm learning to improve my cardmaking by studying others.
But, here is my question. I have a cousin who will recycle my card. Meaning, she takes the front off and attaches it to a different card. At first I was kinda offended. But I think she means well. What do you guys think?
I think that's a compliment, she likes your card enough to send it to someone else. As long as she doesn't take credit for having been the one who made it - that would make me mad.
I send my mom blank cards, with a note on a piece of paper tucked inside. I make those for her to send to other people. She does and she says she always gets a call, e-mail, or something from her friends asking about the card. She doesn't pass it off as hers (plus it says "Handmade by Sophie" on the back - lol).
I've been so incredibly lucky. Everyone I've made a card for has called me to thank me. My mom saves every one. One girl called me to tell me how I had lifted her spirits because she had been ill and depressed and she was touched that someone thought enough of her to take time and make her something special. It made me feel good. I do understand how you all feel. I also sew counted cross-stitch on natural linen and made a beautiful baby sampler for my nephew. It took me a month to sew it and about $150 to frame it. When he turned 3 my sister-in-law gave it away. That hurt me because in my family we save hand-made things like that and hand them to the next generation. I thought she would be saving it and giving it to my nephew when he had his first child. Boy did I learn from that, none of her other children have received any hand-made items from me.
Oh btw, DH is also removed from the list when he said this the last time I gave him card - 'Oh, why do u want to give the card to me & waste it?' I didn't give him one for our anniversary or his b'day & he didn't miss it either.
I'm honestly surprised my husband hasn't said the same thing. If/When mine does I know it'll just be that he means I shouldn't use up (rather than "waste") my supplies, and time on a card for him.
I don't know about this whole "card worthy" thing. I make cards for people cos I like to make cards. I honestly don't care what happens after that. Yes a call or e-mail to say they *got* the card would be nice, let alone to say they liked it (that's asking too much these days IMO unfortunately).
Yeah I have to say I hate it when ADULTS just toss aside stuff, but I can't say that I have made any children's cards that I would be upset over. But it still must hurt -- understandably your intentions were for the mom for her memory collection --
I guess somewhere along the line I stopped making cards for my DD's friends (she is 5 now) and letting my DD make her own for them. If you don't have kids I would probably limit the kids cards to maybe a 3x3 card/insert card type of thing - simple - and maybe do one of those "color your own" to make it even easier - simple, easy, quick and no heartaches. I have actually started making some "color your own" for my sister who used to do a lot of watercolor/oil painting, actually went to art school but has no time for that anymore and she loves it, takes out her little watercolor stash or colored pencils and plays a little with coloring/painting the card.
But, here is my question. I have a cousin who will recycle my card. Meaning, she takes the front off and attaches it to a different card. At first I was kinda offended. But I think she means well. What do you guys think?
My sister does this, but she asked me if it was okay first. I considered it an honor since she is quite a talented stamper herself. Plus she goes on and on about how cute it is first!! I think it's good to recycle. She never does this with birthday cards that I've written about how much I love her though.
When I found a new demo, my former demo ripped up one of my cards and stuck it in my mailbox.
Hard to believe anyone would even think about doing that. It must have been an awful breakup!
Sometimes, people just have a bad day.
My Mom usually delights over my cards, and some sit on the mantle months after the others have disappeared. She treats them like a little work of art. However, last year, I made her a stationery set for Mother's Day. It had a cover made from cardstock, with microbeads on the binding, and 8 cards with no sentiments inside to send on. My Mom does still write to people. When we were little, she always thought stationery was a nice gift. However, with this one, she just sort of said "Oh, thank you." as she lifted it out of the gift bag,and slipped it back in. I have no idea why. I have no idea if she ever used it. Sometimes, things just don't click.
When I found a new demo, my former demo ripped up one of my cards and stuck it in my mailbox.
YIKES!!!! I don't even need to know the reason you dumped Demo #1; how she reacted tells me she is NOT the kind of person I would want to have anything to do with....what a psycho! (the card was a cutie, by the way...) Hope your new demo has taken good care of you.
Skittlebrow I just saw that you posted something for me for the "unappreciated card" stories. My Mom wasn't alone she was sitting in the dining room with everyone, and my sister picked her up and brought her and took her home, so that isn't it. Oh well, maybe you get crankier the older you get.
Cindy
OK i have a weird one to add... I think this was an appreciated card but.. I sent a card in for dh office mate for her bd(On halloween but she wasn't there so the day after OK. ) so he came home yesterday and said she wants to SEE the card you made to send for Christmas this year.
Now he wasn't saying please give me a card for her or send a card to her family but she wants to SEE your Christmas card. I said to him from teh A B C or F list?
Cause I am sending out this year all the leftovers from the last few years to people I know I didn't send one to save the embarassment of sending the same card twice and then have at least two kinds to send for THIS year (if they get mailed which could be why I have so many leftovers..)
Then I said tell her still time for those Christmas orders....
So what was she really asking him to do?? and do I send in a card selection? or one addressed to her and her husband ?? and one I am willing to reproduce?? or WHAT??
or does anybody else think that is STRANGE
(they have worked together for five if not ten years and we have never exchanged cards)
or do i DEFINITELY invite her to my sab party??
LOL
OK i have a weird one to add... I think this was an appreciated card but.. I sent a card in for dh office mate for her bd(On halloween but she wasn't there so the day after OK. ) so he came home yesterday and said she wants to SEE the card you made to send for Christmas this year.
Now he wasn't saying please give me a card for her or send a card to her family but she wants to SEE your Christmas card. I said to him from teh A B C or F list?
Cause I am sending out this year all the leftovers from the last few years to people I know I didn't send one to save the embarassment of sending the same card twice and then have at least two kinds to send for THIS year (if they get mailed which could be why I have so many leftovers..)
Then I said tell her still time for those Christmas orders....
So what was she really asking him to do?? and do I send in a card selection? or one addressed to her and her husband ?? and one I am willing to reproduce?? or WHAT??
or does anybody else think that is STRANGE
(they have worked together for five if not ten years and we have never exchanged cards)
or do i DEFINITELY invite her to my sab party??
LOL
betsy
I have noticed that when men tell you a story, the gist of it sometimes gets changed, and they tend to leave out all the little details that we ladies would put in. For instance, the conversation may have gone like this: Oh, this is a lovely card. Who made it? My wife made it. She makes lots of cards. Really, like what? Well, she's been working on Christmas cards every weekend for the last month. Really? I'd love to see them some time.
Then, DH comes home and tells you that the friend at the office wants to see your Christmas cards.
It might just be a Mars and Venus thing.
If you feel comfortable, give her a call and say "My husband said you mentioned that you wanted to see the Christmas cards I've been working on? End it with a question mark. Then she can explain the conversation.
I think it will work. Let me know!
malindaplace, hearing your story from another perspective, it strikes me that perhaps your grandmother saved your cards on purpose and thought them too precious to use. sounds like it to me.
That's totally me! I'm terrible about hoarding sets of pretty stationery that I get as gifts. I just don't want to use them up! :p
I guess I'm lucky in that the people in my family who have received handmade gifts treasure them, and even ask me to make things. My grandmother got lots of use out of the shawl I crocheted for her in junior high school (adapted the pattern to include armholes so it would stay on better), and my sister requested a new crocheted scarf to replace the one that she had lent to someone she met at a March for Life rally in DC. Mom asks me every now and then if I have a baby blanket on hand for her to give as a shower gift, and my cousin just asked for one as well. I just found out a couple of weeks ago that my boyfriend has every card I ever sent him over the past three years -- even my very first stamped Christmas card, which looking back was pretty bad, and one that I had forgotten I sent! :o He's earned himself a permanent place on my "cardworthy" list!
__________________ Rachel Proud SU! demo and Sci-Fi Geek!
My Stampin' Up! blog "I'm a time traveler -- I point and laugh at archaeologists." 10th Doctor, "Silence in the Library"
I know that my feelings on this may be in the minority. Please don't anyone take any of this as a criticism of how you may feel. I mean absolutely nothing personal here.
For me, making any gift from scratch, whether it's a card, food, items that I crochet, or whatever, is an act of my love for the recipient. The making and the giving is what matters, not the use or lack of use (or even *gasp* disposal) by the person who received it.
If the only way that I can show the proper appreciation for a handmade card is to keep and treasure it forever, then I'm not even card-worthy myself. You see, I'm a pack-rat who has been married to another pack-rat for almost 20 years. I have not-so-secret fantasies of the "Clean Sweep" television show crew showing up at my house and fixing all of my troubles. My number one problem category - PAPER. And that's what cards are. I treasure the time it took for someone to choose or make me a card and send it to me, and I love that they thought enough of me to do so, but I cannot and do not always treasure them by saving them forever. When I get on a cleaning binge, I am absolutely brutal to things that fall in the "paper" category, because if I'm not, we are going to be buried alive in all of the paper. I can only hope that people who send me cards and letters love me enough to understand that I can throw away the physical object while still treasuring the love and the thought.
All of that said, there are people who are on my store-bought-cards-only list. My husband's entire family, for example. I would be thrilled to see one of my cards displayed proudly in someone's home. But I would not be sad to know that they had prioritized the things to keep forever and that my card did not make the cut. It's only paper, after all.
JanTink made my face hurt I was smiling so big!!! That is great advice - I'm going to store that upstairs for future use. TY!!
It does hurt when you put your heart and soul into something and it isn't appreciated. If your friend isn't a card-maker, then she probably has no idea what you actually put into that card. She might not even realize that it hurt your feelings (or ticked you off).
I'd move her to the "not card worthy list" and be done with it. Find someone else that will appreciate your abilities. Want my address? JK!!! LOL Just wanted to make you smile!! Did it work?
I'm going to stop sending homemade cards to my husband's family. I've sent Christmas and birthday cards to his sisters, their husbands and their kids and NOT ONCE has anyone even acknowldged it. Last year I made tags for each and every gift...still nothing. Last time I gave his mom (who was also on the say-nothing bandwagon) a card, she said "oh, is this one of the ones you made on the computer?" I was speechless. The computer?!?!?! Are you kidding me?!?!?
My husband got indignant for me and said that I make them with rubber stamps and pointed out all the stamping, coloring, cutting, scoring, etc that has to be done. Her response? A disinterested "oh." That's it...they're now all one the un-card-worthy (thanks JanTink) list!
swap
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