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Husband wants me to make a sympathy card for his company to send to one of their business associates for the passing of his mother. No problem. He wants me to come up with a sentiment to hand write inside.
Here's where we don't agree and he thinks I am nuts. What are your thoughts?
I think that I should not be the one to be hand writing a sentiment inside. I think it should be either a computer printed sentiment ( like a poem type like you see in the store) since it's a business associate or the senders should be the ones to hand write the sentiment. I think that it would look "off" for me to hand write a nice sentiment and then just have them sign it. The recipient would be able to tell that the one who wrote the "heartfelt" sentiment is someone totally different than the ones giving the card.
He says it would be like a CEO dictating a card for an associate, his secretary writes it out and he simply signs it. I disagree. I think that if you don't know someone well enough to write your own sentiment, or don't want to spend the time thinking about what to write, that you shouldn't get someone else to do it for you. Furthermore, I'm not their secretary.
I made a card for his dad to send to a business associate a while back and had this same issue. He wanted me to make a card and "write something nice inside". I said, uh-uh. The card is from you, not me. You'll have to write your own sentiment.
Tell me, what do you think? Am I just being stubborn on an issue that really doesn't matter? I feel like the art of writing a short heartfelt message inside a card is going by the wayside already. Don't get me to do your work for you.
He just can't understand the difference between a hand written note ad a computer printed one. He says a hand written note would be more personal. I agree that it would be more personal, but the giver of the card should be the one to hand write the message.
Ack!! give me your opinion. :-D
EDA: I will most likely just find a nice verse online somewhere, print it out and adhere it to the inside of the card since he doesn't want to write his own. I just wanted to hear others opinions on this.
Oh, the giver of the card should write it, not you. I let/make DH write the ones to his family for their birthdays, and any colleagues. Christmas I'll do his family, but that's a bit different.
I'm really bad! I agree with you, but I'd handle it differently. I'd tell him I'd be glad to write him a sentiment in the card, but it'll up the cost of the card to $25. If he still wants you to write the sentiment, you can donate the price of the card to a charity of your choice.
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It is not hard, if you're talented enough to be making cards, to learn to get into your Office or Word program and lay out your inside message to size and then print it where it will go on your card stock before you make the card. That solves the hokey look of printing it on a blank piece of paper, cutting it out and then glueing it in. I agree with you that the message should be done in a type face instead of handwritten. The message can be rather generic, like "thinking of you at this difficult time," and then if the recipient is a close person, an additional handwritten personal message can be added by the person giving the card. Professional wise and etiquette wise, this is the way it should be done.
If I sent flowers, the florist would write the sentiment on the card for me...
I also suspect that DH (1) thinks you have better handwriting and (2) thinks you'll have something better to say. Perhaps you could say "I'll dictate it, but you should put it in your own handwriting."
JJameson922- you're right. That wouldn't be hard and it would look a lot better. Thanks.
Skynacho- I'm pretty sure both of those reasons would be correct. Although neither of those reasons are good enough, in my opinion, to get me to do it for him. Maybe he'd go for the "I'll dictate, you write it" idea.
no---he won't write it. it is a man thing. trust me on this.
I have had 2 husbands and over 30 years experience with just this kind of thing. Men don't do sentiments that are heartfelt. It might make them cry...big wimps.
Write it for him and let him sign it. In the long run of life, it really does not matter who wrote what.
Personally, I would go with the printing option. I do all sorts of cards for DH's work that are for other people to sign and I always have a printed sentiment in the inside. For a sympathy cards, I use a script font, for others the font depends on the card, the person getting it and what the inside sentiment is. Also, for me to write something like a sentiment on a card, I have to practice on scrap paper at least a dozen times for it to look even remotely decent, as my handwriting is almost as bad as DH.
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I think printing a nice verse is appropriate. Then your husband can add something simple & handwritten, like "thinking of you at this time" along w/signatures of the business associates or just company name. I just don't think it would mean much to have a handwritten note by someone I didn't know.
Do you have a nice sentiment stamp? You could use a stamp and then emboss it so that it looks professional. That way you're not having to hand write it against your will and he gets something tasteful that he can just sign....
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I computer generate the sentiment for every card I make. That way I can make them more personal. That would be the perfect solution for this situation. Let us know how it turns out! Good luck!
I agree that a printed/stamped sentiment is fine. When I make sympathy cards, I always stamp a sentiment and then add a brief note (like "You're in my thoughts and prayers") before signing it. But if your husband insists on having something handwritten, type up a few options and give them to him so he (or a colleague if it's from a group) can pick the one he likes best and write it in the card.
I would definitely use a printed or stamped sentiment if you don't know the person. If you don't have an appropriate sentiment stamp, then you can print one on vellum. That always looks nice on the inside of a card.
Men don't always "get" that a hand-written sentiment is very special. My husband wanted me to make a hand-made baby card for his friends whom I really don't like. I told him I couldn't do it. While I hoped all went well with their twins, my heart wouldn't be in the making of a card because of the way I feel about the parents. They've always treated me badly. He accepted my decision, although he didn't "get" it.
I feel if you're going to make a handmade card it should have a computer generated none personal sentiment inside. Who ever composes it doesn't matter. It should not be personal and mushy since it's not for a personal friend, it's for a business associate.
Frankly, since it's for a business associate I feel a store bought card might be more appropriate. Your husband's company is not sending to a personal friend but someone they know on a business level. It should be caring but still on a business level.
Handmade cards, I feel are more for personal relationships. In these days, you can't mix business and personal.
I agree with you- you can tell you hubby all the gals are ganging up on him! LOL I think printing something for the inside would make it look alot more professional
Thanks everyone for your comments. It's good to know I'm not the only card maker out there with crazy ideas of how things should be done! I'm going to tell hubby that I asked the experts and they mostly agree with me! Hee!
Quote:
Originally Posted by pjw2855
Frankly, since it's for a business associate I feel a store bought card might be more appropriate. Your husband's company is not sending to a personal friend but someone they know on a business level. It should be caring but still on a business level.
Handmade cards, I feel are more for personal relationships. In these days, you can't mix business and personal.
Just my opinion of how I would handle it.
Patti
Patti, I see your point and understand what you're saying. The cards I usually make for a business associate are very simple and none-frou-frou type cards, so I feel like a hand made card can be OK for business as long as it's done properly.
My husband wants to support me with my card making as well, so I appreciate that he wants to buy cards from me for business use. It's just that he really didn't "get" it at all when I was trying to explain why I should not be the one doing this.
Thanks for having my back, ladies!
I feel if you're going to make a handmade card it should have a computer generated none personal sentiment inside. Who ever composes it doesn't matter. It should not be personal and mushy since it's not for a personal friend, it's for a business associate.
Frankly, since it's for a business associate I feel a store bought card might be more appropriate. Your husband's company is not sending to a personal friend but someone they know on a business level. It should be caring but still on a business level.
Handmade cards, I feel are more for personal relationships. In these days, you can't mix business and personal.
Just my opinion of how I would handle it.
Patti
I think the opposite can be true and that people sometimes really appreciate a personal touch.
My Mom is a regional sales director for a large hotel chain. She meets with meeting planners all over the state trying to book their conventions at their properties. After every meeting, she sends them a hand-stamped thank you card. People just rave about the cards. She gets calls and e-mails about them all the time, and they'll have them hanging up in their office when she visits them a year later. So, if you're in a position where it's important to build relationships with your clients, it can be a good thing.
I definitely agree that there are times that it wouldn't be appropriate. I wouldn't send a handmade thank you after a job interview or any very formal situation.
Back to the OP, I agree with you. If they are going to send a condolence card, they should write it themselves or sign a computer generated sentiment.
inside of cards- help settle a disagreement :)
