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Without hearing her tone, I can't really judge if it was snarky or not... but perhaps she was envious of not only your finding a hobby you love, but the time you have to do it.
The way I see it:
I earn the paycheck. Nobody else does.
I have no wife, nor girlfriend.
I have no kids (except the 34 I teach daily!)
I don't drink, smoke, do drugs, or party.
If this is my diversion, then it's my diversion.
One of my favorite all-time quotes comes from Shakespeare:
"To thine own self be true."
As a guy I struggled with even GETTING into the hobby... worrying about what my buddies may think... even questioning my ahem... manhood. But then I stopped and thought... at the end of my life do I want to look back and say I didn't do something I love because I was worried about what others may (or do) say?
As long as I please God and please myself (in that order)... I really couldn't care less what others think/say about me or my hobby.
Hey Ted. KUDOS!!
My Uncle knits and crochets and has for years (he's 80 years old now) along w/ golfing and other "manly" hobbies!! Keep on keepin' on!!
__________________ We cannot do great things, only small things with great love.
Wow, thanks for all of the responses everyone! I read each and every one and while I'm glad to know it wasn't just me, it's also too bad that so many people out there feel the need to put down what we do for fun.
And I do agree that some people may really not mean anything bad by their comments, but sometimes you can tell by the way a person says something they aren't being very nice. I guess you have to consider the source, right? ;)
I would have said "I just don't know how you find so much time to watch TV." Then smiled at her like I was Craig Ferguson. All the Craig fan's know what I mean, lol.
My Mom was one of the star crafters in the 80's. She still crafts but it's pretty simple nowadays. She still makes beautiful things. My Mom is a TV addict.
Now she says to me "I don't know how you have time to make things or write." Just makes me grit my teeth. I have told her numerous times I don't watch a lot of TV. We do have cable but got it free. My DH & I just bought a brand new TV for gaming. We have not used it at all to watch TV, lol. We watch Netflix and we are big gamer's.
My Mom is having a panic attack about it, ROFL! She's like "You haven't seen this commerical!!!! You didn't see CSI last night! You didn't see this new legal drama I am watching but I can't remember the name of it!" I am serious as can be.
This thread just reminded me of that. My Mom, the crafter, has become a TV junkie.
I am lucky because I do have supportive friends and loved ones. The big area in my crafting life is the crafting women who need to compete or critique. I could go on and on about them. !
lylacfey, you should have seen people's reactions when I told them we got rid of our TV. Keep in mind, I still had high speed internet and watched the few shows I like on-line, but it still completely threw people. I got things like "well, how do you watch TV?" or blank stares, or looks of horror.
I'm still surprised that people are commenting about this hobby. I get all sorts of things about my bicycle - from shock over how much money I spent, to being forced to endure anti-cyclist rants (including being threatened that said person will run me over if I'm in his way), to being told that I'm so lucky that I'm thin (as if the many hours I spend each week keeping myself thin is luck), to being forced to listen to the story of how some other cyclist broke some traffic law and therefore all cyclists are scofflaws. People hate me simply because I'm there, or are confused that I'm spending so much time on a "toy" in traffic. I've had things thrown at me. I had a car deliberately try to run me off the road. I've had all sorts of things yelled at me.
I've never heard a negative thing about my card making. Or, maybe I did but I'm so used to hearing much worse that I didn't notice.
My point is that people will judge no matter what the circumstances and we all need to let it roll off of us. Unless you are in actual physical danger, it's only words. They can only hurt if we let them.
__________________ aka Sue. Or Sue-odd.
No blog for me. My gallery chronicles my card-making successes and mishaps.
I admire men who are brave enough to take up, what is, by and large, considered a "girly" hobby. How come no one ever has issues when us gals take up wood working? Stupid double standard I say! Although my husband is not a crafter, he has often volunteered to work through a tutorial for me before I put it out there and he's proud of his creative talents. High 5 to all the crafty men!
__________________ �:*�*:�My next house won't have a kitchen. Just a bunch of vending machines and garbage cans.�:*�*:�
I try to remind people that although DaVinci and Picasso didn't have a heat embossing gun, they were still artists. In fact, in those days, it was WOMEN you didn't hear doing much art. Then again, way back then, you didn't hear women doing much of anything.
I'm glad we have forums such as this where we can all come and congregate and share our love of this hobby.
__________________ "Satan trembles when he sees the weakest saint on his knees."
Why do people fish? They could go to the store and just buy it. Why do people hunt? They could buy meat or fowl at the store. Why do people golf? No, really, why DO people golf? I like to look at my hobby as a form of wood cutting. Remember the old saying about "When you heat your house with wood, it heats you twice; once when you chop it, and again when you burn it." I get a lot of pleasure out of making the card, and I like to think that people like to receive them. Win - win!
Today, I finally disposed of the 2010 Christmas cards that didn't have portions I would re-purpose. I re-read some of the comments and several people thanked me for my handmade card.
My daughter called before Christmas and asked me if I could make a card to hold 3 gift cards (1-Mr., 1-Mrs & -family). I was surprised when one of the male recipients comments on it. He kept looking at it and opening it. In years passed, he would just tear into the outer card to get to the gift card. Made me chuckle--
I try to remind people that although DaVinci and Picasso didn't have a heat embossing gun, they were still artists. In fact, in those days, it was WOMEN you didn't hear doing much art. Then again, way back then, you didn't hear women doing much of anything.
I'm glad we have forums such as this where we can all come and congregate and share our love of this hobby.
Ted, you may almost be old enough to remember that huge NFL linebacker, Roosevelt Grier. It was all over the TV back then that he had taken up needlepoint! They had pics of him sitting around waiting for practice to start, just stitching away. I loved it!
"As a professional player, Grier was a member of the New York Giants, and the original Fearsome Foursome of the Los Angeles Rams and played in the Pro Bowl twice.
After Grier's professional sports career he worked as a bodyguard for Robert Kennedy during the 1968 presidential campaign and was guarding the senator's wife, Ethel Kennedy, during the Robert F. Kennedy assassination. Although unable to prevent that killing, Grier took control of the gun and subdued the shooter, Sirhan Sirhan.
Grier is known for his serious pursuit of hobbies not traditionally associated with men such as macrame and needlepoint. He has authored several books, including Rosey Grier's Needlepoint for Men in 1973. Grier became an ordained Christian minister in 1983 and travels as an inspirational speaker. He founded American Neighborhood Enterprises, a nonprofit organization that serves inner city youth."
__________________ Bugga in OK
"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible." Dalai Lama
I work in a public library and sometimes people tell me (not there) that they don't have time to read. I tell them that you can always find time to do the things you want/like to do!
Ted, you may almost be old enough to remember that huge NFL linebacker, Roosevelt Grier. It was all over the TV back then that he had taken up needlepoint! They had pics of him sitting around waiting for practice to start, just stitching away. I loved it!
"As a professional player, Grier was a member of the New York Giants, and the original Fearsome Foursome of the Los Angeles Rams and played in the Pro Bowl twice.
After Grier's professional sports career he worked as a bodyguard for Robert Kennedy during the 1968 presidential campaign and was guarding the senator's wife, Ethel Kennedy, during the Robert F. Kennedy assassination. Although unable to prevent that killing, Grier took control of the gun and subdued the shooter, Sirhan Sirhan.
Grier is known for his serious pursuit of hobbies not traditionally associated with men such as macrame and needlepoint. He has authored several books, including Rosey Grier's Needlepoint for Men in 1973. Grier became an ordained Christian minister in 1983 and travels as an inspirational speaker. He founded American Neighborhood Enterprises, a nonprofit organization that serves inner city youth."
I remember him! My dad took up needlepoint for a while. He also liked to hook rugs. Nobody hooks rugs anymore it seems...
I can't say I have ever had a negative comment about my card making. Now maybe something behind my back but it wouldn't bother me anyway. I do what I like and I don't feel like I have to justify what I do to anyone. My husband smokes so if he gets snarky (which is not very often) because I have spent $ on my stamping, I just tell him it's my smokes!
I had a friend say something a little bit hurtful the other day. I was sharing my excitement about some design work I had done and she said something that made it seem trivial and silly.
The thing I have heard soooo many times from well-meaning people is "Wow, your cards are so great. Have you ever thought about selling them? You should, I bet you could get a dollar for these!"
As a stay at home mom, I get a lot out of this hobby. Through the nice comments, I get the validation that I used to get working outside of the home. I get the social interaction with you guys. I get a creative outlet. I get something that's just mine, not about my kids and husband. I don't care if people understand it or not, it makes me happy.
Very true! I hadn't even really thought about it that way before I read this.
It is a sad commentary on our society that people have had to endue these snide comments about a hobby they enjoy. There was a time when people would never think of making these comments to another person. But, sadly in the past 20 years or so it has become fashionable to criticize anyone who does something the other person does not do or does not approve of being done. If everyone enjoyed or bought the same things this would be a very boring world.
Yea for you Ted! I so agree with your comments. I think some people make negative comments because they're jealous because they don't have time or the talent to be creative like us! :p
its usually non-crafters who slam our hobby. and they just will never "get it", KWIM???
Holly, you are right about non-crafters who don't "get it." I have a dear non-crafty friend who is very, very sweet and complimentary, but doesn't get it.
I send her cards quite often, and she usually emails or calls to say she received it and loves it, which is so nice.
One day we met for lunch, and I had made her a card, so I just took it to lunch and gave it to her in person. She oo'ed and ahh'ed and I said thank you, and then something about coloring in the image.
She looked at me in shock and said, "Oh my gosh, you COLOR these? I thought the stamps already came with all those colors."
I had quite a laugh about that.
__________________ Bugga in OK
"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible." Dalai Lama
I had a friend say something a little bit hurtful the other day. I was sharing my excitement about some design work I had done and she said something that made it seem trivial and silly.
The thing I have heard soooo many times from well-meaning people is "Wow, your cards are so great. Have you ever thought about selling them? You should, I bet you could get a dollar for these!"
A whole dollar? Wow!
I get that a lot, too: "You should totally sell these! People pay for handmade cards!"
Me: "Yep... so how much would you pay for a card like the one you're holding?"
Them: *awkward silence* "Um... maybe $2.50?"
Me: "You mean well, I know... but to be honest, it takes me about 30 to 45 minutes to make a card like that... so, if it's 30 minutes, then at that rate, I earn $5.00/hour."
Point: We can never get what we put into a card.
When I have my buddy's girlfriend tell me, "Ted, I've saved every card you ever created for me and also the cards you create for Rob (my best friend)!" that is SO much worth more than $5.00/hour. ;)
__________________ "Satan trembles when he sees the weakest saint on his knees."
I try to remind people that although DaVinci and Picasso didn't have a heat embossing gun, they were still artists. In fact, in those days, it was WOMEN you didn't hear doing much art. Then again, way back then, you didn't hear women doing much of anything.
I'm glad we have forums such as this where we can all come and congregate and share our love of this hobby.
And for most of history, male artists, crafters, authors, tailors, and chefs have been taken more seriously and been better paid. Women are called painters, hobbiests, scribblers, sewers, and cooks. I'm fortunate that my male-dominated family is made up of men who could build the house, install the kitchen, cook the dinner, wash the dishes, and sew buttons back on shirts, all while explaining to their daughters or sisters how to run the circular saw or clean the pistol...
Keep on stamping, Ted and all the gents out there!
And for the snarky comments that come to our fellow crafters: remember, there are only about 16 personality types. Law of averages says that half those types won't understand why we do what we do. Half of those will feel called upon to denigrate it. The remaining 12 types will be appreciative to some degree, so do what you love and hang out here with the rest of us!
__________________ ValliWhen I'm not near the stamp I love, I love the stamp I'm near.My tiny little gallery
Whenever people ask me "Where do you find the time for .....", I answer " I don't find the time, I make the time."
As far as the amount of money invested--I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs,
I craft!! It's a lot cheaper than therapy!
I have been lucky in that for the most part people don't comment on my hobby. My co workers are usually quite interested in my latest project (I work with mostly women) and I am often approached to make a card for someone's special something or other.
As has been stated before. No one need justify why they do something they love unless it's hurtful to other people. We all have our hobbies (or should have) and they are a part of what makes us who we are.
I think my favorite response would be something along the lines of "we make time for what we love" and leave it at that. I, for one, am endlessly greatful for all of the wonderful talented people that take the time to post here on SCS or on assorted blogs. Endless inspiration, wonderful people and awesome projects.
My DH isn't very impressed either, but he supports my hobby. For our 13th wedding anniversary he had California Closets come in and convert our dining room into a crafting room. I love it, but it needs some serious purging and cleaning!
I get that a lot, too: "You should totally sell these! People pay for handmade cards!"
Me: "Yep... so how much would you pay for a card like the one you're holding?"
Them: *awkward silence* "Um... maybe $2.50?"
Me: "You mean well, I know... but to be honest, it takes me about 30 to 45 minutes to make a card like that... so, if it's 30 minutes, then at that rate, I earn $5.00/hour."
Point: We can never get what we put into a card.
When I have my buddy's girlfriend tell me, "Ted, I've saved every card you ever created for me and also the cards you create for Rob (my best friend)!" that is SO much worth more than $5.00/hour. ;)
lol I've heard that too...but if you start making cards to sell them it stops being fun and becomes work...which is one big reason why I don't sew any more. :(
That's not to say I won't do an occasional commission if I feel like it, but I get a lot more pleasure out of just making that perfect card for someone to give to a special person in their life.
Ted, Rosie Greer, a huge football player, crocheted and didn't hide it. Nobody should have to explain what they do for relaxation or pleasure to anybody. They should just mind their own business. I think it's great that this is your hobby! Why not? It's not gender specific and if they think you're gay, just give them a big kiss and walk away - lol. Just kidding. Nothing wrong with being gay either. The Man upstairs created all of us, including gay people. Just saying. My thing is, are people good people? Everything else is secondary. Sound a little preachy. Sorry. Sort of got off topic.
Sounds like some people need a refresher in manners. I usually answer those negative comments with "Well it keeps me off the streets and out of the bars"". To which I have never received a comment. I think it shocks the just enough to remind them of their lack of manners.
I've been lucky that my family and friends appreciate the time that goes into making cards and they save my cards. My husband is very supportive and we turned our dining room into a craft room for both of us; he has a small desk where he works on items for his model railroad layout and I have a large desk/hutch combo for my stamps and paper and punches, etc. We're both retired now and I'm not a TV watcher so I spend my time making cards, scrapbooking, doing counted cross stitch and reading. I also started a card making group in our retirement community and it's my favorite way to spend time with friends.
I don't understand the negative comments either. It makes me sad. :( Usually my so called friends with children will say, "Well, if I didn't have kids I'd have time to do things like that but I am just way too busy." I just smile and say it makes me happy being creative. What they just don't get is that I would trade all the stamps, ink, paper and ribbon to be in their shoes and have the children I long for. Well, maybe not all of it...lol but some people can be so inconsiderate when it comes to others feelings.
You don't have to get upset over that. It only goes to show that they are envious of you.
I know this thread has about ran itself out but just wanted to share a funny with
you all.
I have a brother who always makes the "oh, another homemade card" or "did you make this?" comment. Well, you all know what I mean. Anyway, last week he had a birthday
so I decided to make him a special card.
I stamped a turtle with the sentiment "stopping by to wish you a happy birthday". The
turtle was seriously smeared, the sentiment was thick Stazon, also smeared. Just the
ugliest card you can imagine. He opened the envelope and looked at the card....you
should have seen his face! Talk about a struggle taking place!! I almost broke out laughing watching him. Finally he opened the card and I had stamped "hand smudged
just for you". You could see the relief on his face to know I had intentionally made
that card-that bad. Needless to say my sisters and I had a good laugh!
Now, whether that will stop any future snide comments remains to be seen!!
I only had one comment from a friend that I wasn't sure how she meant it. She said, "Oh I see you made the card"
I said, "Yes, I only make cards for people who are too important to me to give them a store bought card. It takes nothing to pick up a store bought card, but I put my heart into the ones I make for special people in my life.
I think this is especially an issue for us "younger" crafters (no offense, everyone!).
For example, I am twenty-three, and all my friends are doing one of two things at this stage in their lives:
Having babies.
Going drinking.
Sometimes both.
People my age consider crafts "lame" (unless it is knitting, which is apparently so "in" right now).
To people who say they don't have the time/money for crafting because of their children, I say I don't have time/money for children because of my crafting.
Priorities, folks.
A 2009 survey of the American golfer conducted by Golf Magazine found that the average golfer will spend $2,776 per year to satisfy their cravings for the links.
Uhhhhh...I spend about $400 on retreats/crops a year and about $20 a month on supplies. The average cost of a hobby (all hobbies together) is $53 a month in the US. Soooo...I'm pretty average.
Most hobbies cost money. Who would spend their spare time doing something they did not enjoy.
Other hobbies:
Bass fishing (the boat alone...oh my goodness)
Sailing (again, "The BOAT"!)
Wordworking
Flower gardening (if I grew orchids, would I be chastised?)
What we do with our leisure time is what keeps our hearts soaring...no matter the hobby.
I like Ted's Shakespeare quote..."To thine own self be true." Here, here!
I get few comments but the ones I do I know are spurred by motives other than nice.
I blow them off; I have a stressful job and a stressful business and I know this hobby brings me joy, relieves stress and is non-fattening! If my DH doesn't object, why should I let anyone else's thoughts matter?
I only had one comment from a friend that I wasn't sure how she meant it. She said, "Oh I see you made the card"
I said, "Yes, I only make cards for people who are too important to me to give them a store bought card. It takes nothing to pick up a store bought card, but I put my heart into the ones I make for special people in my life.
She smiled and said "Oh it is beautiful."
Super answer, Barbara! It is great!
I'm going to share it with a friend who has many family members who feel called upon to be negative.
You've got class!
__________________ ValliWhen I'm not near the stamp I love, I love the stamp I'm near.My tiny little gallery
To people who say they don't have the time/money for crafting because of their children, I say I don't have time/money for children because of my crafting.
Priorities, folks.[/QUOTE]
;) It really is a good thing I started having kids before learning to stamp!
...But is it strange I have pet names for certain stamps? Hmm...
__________________ ValliWhen I'm not near the stamp I love, I love the stamp I'm near.My tiny little gallery
To people who say they don't have the time/money for crafting because of their children, I say I don't have time/money for children because of my crafting.
Priorities, folks.[/QUOTE]
;) It really is a good thing I started having kids before learning to stamp!
...But is it strange I have pet names for certain stamps? Hmm...[/QUOTE]
Maybe our stamps and supplies are more like kids than we're willing to say!
(regarding putting zots behind a bow... completely frustrating at times!):
"Why can't you two play nicely?!"
(centering a mat on a card front):
"Ugh! If I have to take you off and start over, you're going to be sorry!"
(heat embossing only to find that there are stray specks now garnishing your card):
"Oh no! I did NOT tell you you could go there!"
They have parenting classes. Maybe they need to have Crafters' Anger Management Programs (C.A.M.P.) :P
__________________ "Satan trembles when he sees the weakest saint on his knees."
