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I admit it. I have timing issues with regard to getting cards out on time but I think that a personal card could be worth it. The hubs however, is tired of hearing his mother moan about cards being late. To be fair if they are late to us she moans at us too :confused:... I told him fine - we will go to the dollar store and buy his family cards and send them at the beginning of the year and stop sweating it. I love making cards and I know the MIL is only going to moan about them not being hand made any more. TBH it isn't just the card but it is having to go to the post office to mail them (international) that often makes an on time card late. How dare I have a life where I can't get to the Post office!
So does anyone else get moaned at for sending a late card? Should I give in? I guess I could always do challenges and donate cards instead. I just liked the personal touch of sending something for someone that I actually thought about them and didn't pick up something close at the dollar store, sign it, address it and slap a stamp on it.
Would you give in and just send store bought? Ugh!
My whole family knows a card will be late from me most of the time if I remember to mail it at all. My son found his birthday card on the couch where I had laid it down then forgot. He said "Is this for me?" Of course it was it had his name on it.
They also know I will find Christmas gifts in July for Christmas the year before..... I have a real problem of forgetting where I put stuff!!
Oh, I have the "safe place" issue too... I guess, part of the issue is that I'm not sending a card to anyone under 18 now. Maybe I will send to everyone and store bought for the MIL so it is on time, I'm the black sheep anyway! LOL!
I am right there with you on the lateness thing. I am presently behind on a couple of birthday cards, anniversary cards, and fall cards with my daughter's school photo for family and friends.
No one moans at me -- maybe after all these years of 'belated' on just about every birthday card, they're used to it!! Ha - I've lowered expectations, so they'll all just be floored when I finally get my act together!
Now that most family members know that I can make cards, they kind of expect handmade. And we're all grownups so they don't worry about getting it on THE day. It's nice that they appreciate them though so I need to push myself to get organized about it. I actually have a couple of days set aside to make all the birthday cards for the next year (*fingers crossed*).
I also have a small stash of cards but somehow none of them are every exactly what I'd want for a certain individual or occasion. I'm like you - if I'm sending a handmade card, I want it to be especially made for that person.
Never really thought about sending store bought and just making card to donate. I think if the pressure of making special ones got to be too much, then I'd consider that. But I prefer to think that I could manage my time better so I don't feel pressured. Maybe one day .
oh, so sorry RiverIsis late cards are not truly acceptable, nothing can replace a hand made card so loved ones may accept the tardy card cuz they like your work. A birthday dosen't change from one year to the next that leaves you 11 months to plan make and mail a card. Hallmark says it all, starts out.....When you care enough....................
Maybe 2012 will be your new on time year, everyone of us have our little faults and pet peeves don't let it wear ya down.
Or you could be really :twisted: and send a box right at the beginning of the year with ALL the cards for the whole year in it. Just label them with the date. Then there can't be any complaints about them being late. :mrgreen:
But I'll agree with some others that it was rude of MIL to even bring it up. It is possible to mail stuff in plenty of time and still have it be late.
__________________ "You may not have lost all your marbles, but there's definitely a hole in the bag." Grumpy Cat
Keep making your cards but just put a foot forward and make them earlier. I am going to try to start making my cards a month b4 they are due out. That way I won't feel pressured. Its all about having fun so don't let anyone ruin that for you.
I too think a personal card late is better than none at all. But I try to be organised and send mine on time because I'm a punctual type of person . However, I just realised that I missed an October birthday and I'll have to make a special belated one for that! I've never had anybody complain about a late card on the odd occasion I do forget or fall behind.
I would NEVER instead send a store bought card.......EVER!! All the cards I send out are hand created. I just mark on my calendar dates and make sure they get sent out in time to be delivered to the person on time. I don't see that as a big deal to manage.
I don't know if this is an option over there, but our Royal Mail now lets you pay postage online, and print off a postage sticker. Saved my bacon a few times, lol. I agree, the biggest problem is getting to the post office- they are open when I am at work, and lunch break trips don't stand a chance- the queues are usually long enough I'd be lucky to get back to work for the next day.
I have to agree with a previous poster, let your husband due the work if he is tired of hearing the groaning.
Or you could make a bunch of simple cards in advance then when you have time mail a few the month before. So she will still get her handmade card instead of the dollar store card, but it won't be super personal therefore easier for you.
I feel badly you're having to put up with this! Some people have no respect or courtesy. That said, I have to agree that if your husband is tired of the moaning, let him take care of cards for his family! The "ugly" side of me says said the old crow a dollar store card. I try not to give into that side - lol! I guess I'd give my husband the choice and then that would be the end of that discussion for good! I'm really not a wench, I just get tired of what I perceive to be pettiness and like things solved once and for all for this little garbage!
I think my family would be shocked if they ever got anything on time! I have presents a whole year ahead, but it is the keeping track and getting them into the mail that throws me.
I stamped a card with a belated birthday greeting on it and my teenage daughter said. Oh, are you just stamping that because you know you're going to be late....grrrrr
Just to say, I do mananged to get some things out on time but like my October cards were late because in September I had to become primary caregiver for my mother who broke her femur (still in wheelchair). My MIL knows this. So I guess I'm just frustrated.
And I have everything written down to go out in plenty of time - that silly "life" thing often gets in the way. Hopefully soon I will have time to get ahead... I've already decided to simplify my Christmas cards this year. Can't do them too far in advance I print a little update inside. Thanks. It is great to hear I'm not the only one that has these issues! Guess time to get less personal!
I make my cards and keep them on hand so I can send them when I need to. I also find that whenever possible, I just stick a stamp on them and toss them in the mailbox so I don't have to go the PO because it is SO hard to get to the post office and take care of things like that!
I think part of this is that I have a different concept to making cards than many do - I actually use the recipient as my muse. They don't just get a challenge card I did but a card that I thought of by thinking of them.
I don't know if I want to just send a challenge card made for the sake of it card. That isn't the kind of cardmaker I am. I don't think there is anything wrong with that if that works for others. However, I'm not certain how much joy I would get from sending a challenge card and lets be honest the reason why we make cards is because it brings us some elements of joy.
Maybe I just need a stamp that says all that to stamp on each card! LOL!
As for popping a stamp on, it's not that easy with international post and packaging. I do that with my post that stays in the country. Most of my cards are so dimensional for my overseas relatives that I even have to fill out custom forms for a card.
Hopefully this will be the year I get my cards down in January like I promised myself last year! and the year before! LOL!
I quit making Christmas cards for anyone not in my stamp club. After several years of making a substanial number of cards I said enough. This year I haven't made very many cards at all. I am planning on trying to get everything better organized once I get my stamp room put together. I have no problem sending out store bought cards when I need to though. The only cards I always make are the ones for DH.
__________________ Denise
"If a person who indulges in gluttony is a glutton, and a person who commits a felony is a felon, then God is an iron.�
― Spider Robinson
oh, so sorry RiverIsis late cards are not truly acceptable, nothing can replace a hand made card so loved ones may accept the tardy card cuz they like your work. A birthday dosen't change from one year to the next that leaves you 11 months to plan make and mail a card. Hallmark says it all, starts out.....When you care enough....................
Maybe 2012 will be your new on time year, everyone of us have our little faults and pet peeves don't let it wear ya down.
Anita
I have to agree with this. It really isn't appropriate to send the cards late, knowing the date of the birthday, and yes, it doesn't change from year to year. I try very hard to send things out on time. I also try to be on time to appointments, and dates of any kind. I would not expect someone to wait for me, nor would I keep someone else waiting. Their time is valuable too. But sometimes, life does get in the way, and occasionally, things do happen to get in the way of our best layed plans.
I think part of this is that I have a different concept to making cards than many do - I actually use the recipient as my muse. They don't just get a challenge card I did but a card that I thought of by thinking of them.
I don't know if I want to just send a challenge card made for the sake of it card. That isn't the kind of cardmaker I am. I don't think there is anything wrong with that if that works for others. However, I'm not certain how much joy I would get from sending a challenge card and lets be honest the reason why we make cards is because it brings us some elements of joy.
Maybe I just need a stamp that says all that to stamp on each card! LOL!
As for popping a stamp on, it's not that easy with international post and packaging. I do that with my post that stays in the country. Most of my cards are so dimensional for my overseas relatives that I even have to fill out custom forms for a card.
Hopefully this will be the year I get my cards down in January like I promised myself last year! and the year before! LOL!
Oh, YES! International shipping does require the post office and that is challenging. I get that, totally!!!! I like to make cards for specific people a lot, too, just not always. My parents get specific ones, but sometimes I make them for them WAY in advance just because I get an idea and run with it! LOL!
I totally agree with RiverIsis. I make cards for friends/relatives specifically for that person. Their personality, like/dislikes are my muse, too.
This is a great thread you started. It's interesting to read different opinions on this subject. I guess it all comes down to the old do what works best for you and that's the "right" answer!
BTW I totally get that dates don't change- however living a life is fluid than that. As I said we aren't talking about 5 year olds that have no concept of family emergencies.
So people that say tough the dates don't change would you send store bought to ensure the date even though that is less personal?
I sat down a while back and made a list of every birthday in every month. The intention (I think I did this for a couple) was to have it handy when I sat down to create as a reminder of who i needed cards for in the next month or so. Did it happen? For a bit.
But I totally feel for you - I found a sympathy card that got mixed into something else a few months ago, stamped and ready to go but never made it to the mailbox. That one I won't mail late.
__________________ Diana
*******
Save your drama for your llama.
Oh yeah - I have a list of all the cards I need to get done. One to be hand delivered for the 15 and the week after that, Christmas and then I'm on to January Birthdays etc... LOL! The irony is sometimes the cards are late because I can't find the right "Gift" there are so many postal restrictions these days!
I always make at least two of any card. If it's a design I really like, it's more likely to be 4 or 6. I donate most of what I make, but I usually hold back at least one from any batch I do. Lately I've been doing more cards without sentiments, which allows more flexibility for the people I donate to.
With the system I've just described, I've always got at least 20-or-so cards in my personal stash, so I've got a selection from which to choose something appropriate to the person I have in mind as a recipient.
Does that mean I always get something out in a timely fashion? Absolutely not. But I'm working on it. I'm also a big fan of sending a card for no particular reason, just to let someone know that I'm thinking of them, and because it's fun for any of us to receive something personal in our mailboxes.
If you all want to feel REALLY GOOD about yourselves, I'll 'fess up: I just put away the Halloween cards for the third year in a row that still haven't gone postal! I made them, forgot about them, never mailed them (Year One). I got them into envelopes, addressed them, never got to the post office (Year Two). This year we had a family crisis that we were dealing with in September and October and when it was resolved and I went to mail the cards, I realized that everyone had moved and I didn't have the new addresses. I didn't get them in time to mail out the cards, sadly... Ah well, maybe I can redeem myself with Christmas cards, right?
Just to say, I do mananged to get some things out on time but like my October cards were late because in September I had to become primary caregiver for my mother who broke her femur (still in wheelchair). My MIL knows this. So I guess I'm just frustrated.
That's totally understandable on both counts - being late in October and being frustrated that your MIL knew why and, I guess, still complained?
What I can't fathom is my half-sister who has been in the same job for over 20 years and knows she is really busy correcting term papers and exams in the lead-up to Christmas. I've got calendars and desk-diaries from her as late as August the following year, when it's way too late for them to be any use. You'd think that in these days of mail order she could find a way round. And we'd hear all about it if we neglected her . I don't recall that she was any more timely the year she was on sabbatical either ;).
I have a SIL who complains when I don't get cards mailed out to her and her family on time, but she doesn't complain directly to me she complains to her husband and my MIL who then tell my husband. For the most part my BIL could care less if he gets a card or not and we do usually call them on the day of there birthday/special occasion, but if he doesn't say anything to us he gets nagged. The only birthday cards that I get out in time are the ones for the month of December because I make the birthday cards when I make the Christmas cards and I get them all addressed and stamped to go out in the mail the first week of December. I wouldn't worry about it to much you have alot of other things going on in your life and if people can't understand that life happens then that is there issue.
In our family we have a mystery. Our very sweet sister-in-law habitually sends birthday cards (she’s not a cardmaker, so they are store bought) approximately 2 week’s late. She always writes, “I’m sorry this is late.” This has been going on for many years. She very seldom misses anyone’s birthday … but they are ALWAYS late by two weeks or more. No one will mention it to her because we love her and are grateful that she remembers us with nice cards …. but why are they always late?? If she can remember to mail them two weeks late, why can’t she remember to mail them so that they will arrive at the right time? Tis a mystery.
__________________ Rita
God demonstrated His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us ... being now justified by His blood, we shall be saved from wrath through Him. Romans 5:8 & 9
I think I am more inclined to agree with "love pretty paper" and "karen99". A card that is more than a day or two late feels rude and even a little disrespectful. The sender had 365 days to get it together and in the mail on time. If there is some meaningful message about receiving a hand-made card because I'm worth it, then the whole after-the-fact tardiness erased that sentiment and now I feel like an after thought.
And in this day of hustle and bustle, I get really tired of hearing the same excuses over and over again. Yes, life happens. Yes, we are ALL busy. But that's why we have these really handy tools like calendars, daily planners, and electronic reminder do-dads - to help us stay on top of our crazy schedules and stop hiding behind excuses for our procrastination. And when the BIG things in life pop up unexpectedly (major illness, premature labor, death, etc.) I don't think anyone should worry about a piece of cardstock being mailed out at all.
I tell my kids that people's perceptions of them has to do with patterns of behavior. If you are the kind of person that is ALWAYS a day late or a dollar short - that says something about you. If you are ALWAYS on time and prepared, then that one time you aren't, folks are a lot more forgiving. And, you have nearly total control over that perception by your own habitual behavior, so make it count. (Lord, I sound like my father!)
And that whole thing about resenting sending cards for your spouse's family grates me the wrong way too. You married in - it's your family too. That being said, unless your spouse is missing a hand, there isn't a valid reason on earth that they can't sign a card, address an envelope and stick a stamp on it in the same timely manner that you can. If it's so important to them, then they can step up to the plate and prove it.
In our family we have a mystery. Our very sweet sister-in-law habitually sends birthday cards (she�s not a cardmaker, so they are store bought) approximately 2 week�s late. She always writes, �I�m sorry this is late.� This has been going on for many years. She very seldom misses anyone�s birthday � but they are ALWAYS late by two weeks or more. No one will mention it to her because we love her and are grateful that she remembers us with nice cards �. but why are they always late?? If she can remember to mail them two weeks late, why can�t she remember to mail them so that they will arrive at the right time? Tis a mystery.
I love our different perspectives in this thread! TBH I think it is kinda funny and quirky that this IS what your SIL does. Heck, at this point in time it would almost be disappointing if it were on time!
I think (at least to me) is that somewhere along the lines of punctuality we are forgetting it is the thought that counts. How great should it be to any of us that we are thought about in a loving way for someone to send us a card early, on time or late?! They thought about us (or conversely)!
Guess it is time to get my November, December and January cards done!
My dad was one of those that you were either early or on time or you weren't going. I'm kind of the same. I will admit an occasional belated card because I forgot, but if it's all the time, I'd look for ways to remind myself. I have sticky notes everywhere! ;)
I'm fortunate that I don't have that large a family to make cards for, but I'm always late with cards too. Luckily no one ever complains. They know you can't rush a masterpiece :lol: :lol: :lol: My husband doesn't "do" holidays so he could care less about sending cards and never says a word about when they go out. The only time I truly push myself to get them out on time is for Christmas cards.
I think I am more inclined to agree with "love pretty paper" and "karen99". A card that is more than a day or two late feels rude and even a little disrespectful. The sender had 365 days to get it together and in the mail on time. If there is some meaningful message about receiving a hand-made card because I'm worth it, then the whole after-the-fact tardiness erased that sentiment and now I feel like an after thought.
And in this day of hustle and bustle, I get really tired of hearing the same excuses over and over again. Yes, life happens. Yes, we are ALL busy. But that's why we have these really handy tools like calendars, daily planners, and electronic reminder do-dads - to help us stay on top of our crazy schedules and stop hiding behind excuses for our procrastination. And when the BIG things in life pop up unexpectedly (major illness, premature labor, death, etc.) I don't think anyone should worry about a piece of cardstock being mailed out at all.
I tell my kids that people's perceptions of them has to do with patterns of behavior. If you are the kind of person that is ALWAYS a day late or a dollar short - that says something about you. If you are ALWAYS on time and prepared, then that one time you aren't, folks are a lot more forgiving. And, you have nearly total control over that perception by your own habitual behavior, so make it count. (Lord, I sound like my father!)
And that whole thing about resenting sending cards for your spouse's family grates me the wrong way too. You married in - it's your family too. That being said, unless your spouse is missing a hand, there isn't a valid reason on earth that they can't sign a card, address an envelope and stick a stamp on it in the same timely manner that you can. If it's so important to them, then they can step up to the plate and prove it.
[off the soapbox]
YES, YES, a thousand times YES! I've been saying this for years, and I totally agree with you.
Anyone else?
